I thought your parole conditions prevented you from leaving NY State without telling your PO  (parole officer).    What's of interest in South Carolina?   Did you buy fireworks for the Fourth of July?   It's a crazy State.  You can buy an AK-47 or a 50 Cal. Machine Gun but you can't get a glass of wine with your dinner.   Most Counties there are "dry".

What is the nickname of the University of South Carolina?

By the way, what's wrong with the smell of herring?

The Gamecocks. There's nothing wrong with the smell of herring, but you smelled from it at a KKK rally. On one of the corners in Greenvillke, S.C., I saw your twin. He was sleeping in a Cardboard box with a bottle of ripple wine and a styrofoam cup with change in it. Why didn't you tell me in advance ? I have a friend who works at the local shelter who could have gotten you a cot and a hot meal ! I hope the dime I dropped in the cup helped a little !

Do you know what I liked about Rikers?    You get "Three Hots and a Cot".  ThaTY MEANS THREE HOT MEALS A DAY AND A PLACE TO SLEEP.

Weren't you voted "Best License Plate Maker On your Cell Block" ? Orange always was a good color for you !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did you get to spend time with Martha Stewart ???

I was in charge of making license plates starting A thru J and Vanity plates like;  "ASSMAN".  In fact, I made the license plates for that famous Seinfeld episode where Kramer got the vanity plates instead of the Proctologist.

Martha Steward served her time at a fancy Federal Prison in Pennsylvania with tennis courts and cooking classes.   A fellow that I later worked with did do a nickel (that's five years) in Leavenworth, Kansas for trying to frag his platoons' Captain in Vietnam.           (un)Fortunately he only shot him in the groin. 

You would know what a "nickel" is since you did 5 years at Attica ! I still have the personalized license plate that you made for me ! I want one of those "Diplomat" plates so that I can park anywhere in the world for free. On your next bid, can you make me one ? If you do, I can get you time off for good behavior !

I have a better idea!   Suppose I kick your ass at the upcoming reunion.  I confess to the assault and serve three to five at Sing-Sing, Elmira, Woodbourne,  or Eastern Correctional.

There, I will make you a special license plate; Schmuck-1 and also put the handicapped symbol on it so you can park in the closest spaces in any parking lot.   Oh, bye the way, by then you will really need the handicapped designation. 

Listen Miller, if that's your real name?  I'll see you Friday Night at the Reunion and we will once and for all, settle our disagreements like real men.  We'll flip baseball cards, or go "ink-a-dink a bottle of ink, the cork fell out and you stink", or start to "rank-out" each others Mothers, or some other sub-puberty method that worked in 1960..  

So be afraid!.................Be very afraid!

After last night's reunion I realized that I had you confused with a different Kenny Miller.

Please disregard ALL previous messages!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You guys sure keep me entertained. This last one was the best Maxie. Nice seing you guys the other night. Your bantering would make a great blog.

Steve G.

Steve, unfortunately I was unable to attend the Reunion this weekend because British Petroleum paid me to try to plug the oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico with Kenny Miller's oversized, melon head.   It didn't work either!

Someone must have been impersonating me at the reunion.  Could it have been Jon Mostel, David Reiter's half Brother?

I'm also the other Kenny Miller !!!! Max Jarolem was at the reunion; how come you weren't ? You were probably working at Waldbaum's preparing the labels for next Pesach !

If you are also the other Kenny Miller AND I am the other Max then there is an anomole in the Time/Space fabric of the Universe.   We cannot be both in the same Universe.  One of us must leave.  You go and I'll hold the worm-hole open for you, Worm!  I don't think I like either one of you.  Did you think Steve Gordon snubbed us at the reunion?  I do.

Steve Gordon is the other Kenny and also the other Max ! It's all Dawn's fault !

Does anyone know who this Max Jarolem is ? He didn't go to JHS 67; he never lived in the neighborhood ; he's an imposter ; send him back to Waldbaum's !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who is this guy ???? If anyone knows, call 911 at once !!!!

Mr. Jarolem,

Don't you feel bad that no one remembered you at the reunion ? Even your fellow cellmates from Leavenworth forgot about you ! Excuse me, there was one individual from The Little Neck Lions Potsy team who said you were an excellent water boy !  By the way, do you live in Greattttttttttttttttttttttttt  Neckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk because you have a neck like a giraffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ????

We are called GREAT NECKERS because we know how to "make out".  

There were other people at the reunion with the same last name; Miller.  It is a very common name and I found you to be just as common.

I traced my ancestry back to Old New Amsterdam in the 1660's.   There was a woman named Anna Joralemon (my family names' correct spelling) who is credited with the invention of the first donut.  The Dutch settlers in New Amsterdam called them "oily kakes".

There also was a Dutch farmer who bought land in Brooklyn, near the river, in 1803 from the famous Livingston Family.   Joralemon St. in Downtown Brooklyn was named for Thadeus Joralemon also one of my ancestors.

Do you have any famous relatives that you can talk about?  By the way, did you steal my wallet at the reunion?

Yes  I stole your wallet ! Big deal, you had your usual 37 cents in it ! My ancestry is better than your's ! NAH NAH NAH !!!

It's not the 37 cents; that you can keep!  Please invest it wisely, in a pyramid scheme.

I am more concerned with the documents contained in the wallet.  Many are irreplaceable; like my lifetime discount card to Waldbaums and my membership card to Andy Devine's "Andy's Gang" , and my autographed picture of Soupy Sales.  Please return these post haste!   Don't forget to also send back my 1961 Little Neck Lions, LIFL Game Schedule. 

I also stole your submarine race watcher's card ! This means that you can no longer attend any of Murray the K's Rock'N Roll shows at the Brooklyn Paramount or the Brooklyn Fox Theatres. In addition, you're forbidden to watch American Bandstand, Jocko's Rocket Ship, or Wolfman Jack ! You're also banned from stamping the "Kosher For Passover" labels and are limited to the "Kosher For Simchat Torah" labels. Now, you can really plunk your magic twanger, Froggy Jarolem !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll be good, I will I will. Heh, heh,heh.

Mr. Gordon,

Where does it say that Ocala, Florida can bud in to a New York conversation ? You are no longer a New Yorker, as you decided to go Benedict Arnold on us "real" New Yorkers !

Take Care Y'all  !

Whasa matta fo you. Y'all. You can take the boy out of NY, but you can't take NY out of the boy. So, don't be jealous, just go with the flow. Relax and have a layed back attitude like we done do here in da South, boy.

Kenny Miller; Who made you the spokesperson for real New Yorkers?   I think it's fine for Steve to comment on the good old days growing up in NYC.

Trivia Questions for either of you:  

On the TV show "Andy's Gang", what was the name of the talking cat?  

What film serial about an Indian Boy did they show each week?  

Who did several cameos as the person that Froggywould confuse with his wisecracks?  (Hint: He appeared in the movie "The Godfather" as the Baker.)

Was Andy Devine really very fond of little boys & girls or just an old pedaphile?

Name the four (4) flavors of BONOMO's Turkish Taffy, and did Little Neck Dentist Dr. Lipelis really own Bonomo's Candy Company?

Who was the sponsor of The Captain Midnight Show?

Mr. Jarolem,

I appointed myself spokesperson ! Should you not accept this, this message will disappear in 30 seconds !

I don't know the answers to any of your trivia questions except:

Ovaltine was Midnight's sponsor .

The flavors for turkish taffy were: vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, banana.

Andy Devine was a pedophile and had a thing for Froggy and Michael Jackson.'s kids. Later in life, he thought his name was Andy Griffith, and had a thing for Opie ! Even later, he thought he was Andy Williams and was in to the Osmond Brothers !

PS- Steve Gordon, y'all take care of Steinbrenner's horses down in Ocala & fetch some hay !

His horse farm is right down the street from us. He says to say hi to all y'all.

Good on the ovaltine and midnight the cat. The boy was Sabu. Don't know about Devine's sexual habits. Seems Max is on top of that...Hmmmm?

Anyway, have a great day guys.

"Saturday night in OCALA-" Look Harvey, there's a truck"!

Is it true that they're more horses than people there ??????????????

Many of the people in Ocala have cross-bred with the horses so it's hard to differentiate between horses and people.  Lets say there are more than a few mixed breeds; half horse-half man (like in Greek Mythology)  Ocala is in the hilly section of Florida and someone once tried to sell me land there about 35 years ago but I refused to bite on that one.

To answer the trivia questions:   Midnight was the cat's name on Andy's Gang AND Vito Scotto played many of the unsuspecting dupes of Froggy the Gremlin as well as the Baker who asked Marlin Brando for a favor the Day of the Godfather's Daughter's wedding.. 

Actually, Froggy was real; it was Andy that was a puppet!  Go "Plunk Your Magic Twanger!" Do you think that had a subliminal message?

If you passed up a land deal 35 years ago, you should find a horse to kick you or worse.

You know alot about Devines' sexual preferences and about horse breeding with humans. I'm convinced you play off your pervertions on others, but let's keep that between us...and almost 1000 of our closest neighbors in DD/BH.

You just keep cracking me up.

You have too much idle time in your life ! Why don't you ask Mr. Steinbrenner if he needs someone to rake the horse manure ???

Take Care Y'all !

All that I can remember about the land in Ocala Florida, that someone wanted to sell  me, was that it was about 100 miles from the nearest ocean or GULF Of MEXICO (oil ruined) and it was in an area that thought that Jews had horns and still had a branch of the KKK in town.   You can keep that part of Florida as far as I'm concerned.

Good Bye Y'ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did you steal my wallet?    Although you admitted taking it at the Reunion you never said why.   Was it so you could get your hand into my tousers?   Was it that you are jealous that I live down the road from folksong writer and radio host Oscar Brandt?  Or was it just for old time sake?   Have you used my Waldbaums lifetime employee discount card yet?    You get Double Plaid Stamps if you buy Herring at the Appetizing counter.

Remember when OLD GOLD CIGARETTES had coupons on the outside of the pack?  If you saved enough of them you could trade them in for an Iron Lung.

  Max, I stole your wallet because I lost my submarine race watcher's card and needed another one. I hired Fotiadis to take your wallet and he did his jjjjjob ! I'm very jealous that you live down the street from Oscar Madison or Oscar Brand X ! I have all his records. I also used your Waldbaum's discount card and got 10% off matjes herring. Do you also live near that Dr. who was screwing young girls ?

PS- Steve Gordon, how are George's horses doing, y'all ?????????????????

Dawn, when's the reunion ?????

I do not know "witch" Doctor you are referring to, but I do live 2 blocks from the former Bayside High School Math Teacher who gave computer lessons, in his Great Neck house to youing boys and was arrested a few years ago for being a pedaphile.  He is serving a life sentence in Federal custody and his son was also sent to prison.   Do you remember that incident?   I also live down the street from a dishonest Great Neck Kosher Butcher!  Oye-Geavalt!!!!!

In the "Rocky and Bullwinkle" cartoons,  where in Minnesota did they live?  What University did Bullwinkle The Moose play football for?   Where they gay, or just good friends?  Name at least two other cartoon segments produced by Jay Ward.

Was Soupy Sales real name Matzoh Ball Myerson?

I never watched Rocky & Bullshit Winkle. I was much too sophisticated for that show. I was a Popeye man ! Don Zimmer looks just like Popeye ! Since you live in Great Neck, how come there was only $ 1.37 in that wallet that we stole from you ? At least you had the submarine race watcher's card ! Next time, please make it worthwhile for the pick pocketers and have some damn money in that wallet !

PS-In answer to your question about Soupy Sales, his real name was not MatzohBall Meyerson ! This sounds like a deliberate anti-semetic remark, and I'm highly offended ! Al Sharpton will hear about this !

Soupy's real name was actually Clam Chowder Lipshitz !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He was named after Leo the Lip Duroucher !!!

Rocket J. Squirrel and Bullwinkle T. Moose lived in Frostbite Falls, Minnesota.

Bullwinkle played football for Whats-a-Matter U.? (then went Pro in the Canadian League.)

Jay Ward also produced; "Dudley DoRight", Mr. Peabody and His Pet Boy Sherman", and "Fractured Fairy Tales".

I was born in Frost Bite Minnesota. When I was 4, I moved to Butt duck, Arkansas, and at 9, moved to Arm Pit, Iowa. Later on, my folks wrapped me in a cereal box and sent me to Battle Creek, Michigan. They didn't get anything in return because they forgot to enclose the UPC code !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the next reunion is at the DELRAY BEACH ASSISTED LIVING FACILITY..WALKIN'S 100 DOLLARS, WHEEL CHAIRS/WALKERS ADDITIONAL 19.99 PER WHEEL.

nO DISCOUNT FOR AIDES ACCOMPANYING THE ALUMNI.

What's on the menu- stewed prunes, puree vegetables, warm milk, farina ?

  Kenny,

There wasn't any UPC symbols back then.  Your parents did receive something from Kelloggs';  your Brother Larry!   I've been to Intercourse Pennsylvania.   Have you ever stayed their?

I have been to Intercourse, PA. I prefer Fellatio, Arizona. It's hotter !

I hear that there is always a stiff breeze blowing in Fellatio, Arizona.   That's just outside Tucson Arizona where Doug Andriole lives.  

I've been to Blue Balls in Pennsylvania too.   Those Amish are so shy and unassuming.  So why do they name towns Intercourse and Blue Balls?  

Ever been to (Michael) Jackson's Hole, Wyoming?

Dawn,

You stoled my idea for the next reunion!!!   Shame on you!    Check out the new message I wrote on the website about Reunion 2020 at the Little Neck Nursing Home.

Max Jarolem,

Are you the Great Neck resident that I've been reading about who goes from house to house identifying himself as the Chow Chow Cup man and attempts to sell hollow egg rolls to poor, honest working people ???? Aren't you ashamed of yourself ???? You were also the person at the reunion who put a bunch of those cocktail meatballs in your pocket to bring home for your pet ferret !!!!

Why do you write in such large letters?   Trying to make up for other short comings?   It almost feels like your yelling.

It's not a Ferret!

It's a pet BADGER!

MR. JAROLEM,

It's the quality, not the quantity that counts!

My apologies for confusing a ferret with a Badger ! Is the opposite of a Badger, a Goodger ? Is there any College that has a Ferret as a mascot ? The Wisconsin Ferrets sound pretty good !

PS- What do you do with the filling of the egg rolls, sell them by the pound ???????

There is only one College with a BADGER as a mascot and that is THE University of Wisconsin at Madison.   I believe C.W. Post College has the Ferret as a mascot

I took all the egg roll fillings from the Douglaston Manor and I am selling it as momentos of JHS 67's 2010 Reunion.  Check my website:   www.LouissPasteur.Vomit.com.

Do you have any momentos of E.J. Korvette?

CW Post is the Pioneers ! I do have a momento from korvette's. I have a photo of some punk ass Waldbaum's employee who tried to get work at Korvette's, and was thrown out and pushed down Dead Man's Hill !

How many women do you think Tiger will hit on this weekend at the US Open ?

MR. JAROLEM,

Just because I haven't bothered you in a while, it doesn't mean I like you ! You're still the same uncaring Waldbaum's employee who knows nothing about schmaltz ! You're also still part of the Little Neck Lion team that couldn't beat the Mighty Sisters of the Blessed Skunks of Bayonne, N.J. and The A.C. Walker Walkerettes !