I have been away for about 6 months, without access to this website. I got out early for good behavior.

Are you still alive?   Do you still beleive you are better than me?   You're wrong!

Put that in your pot pipe and smoke it!

I still say, you don't know the difference between a schmaltz herring and cherry herring ! You probably drink schmaltz herring and eat cherry herring with your fingers ! At Waldbaum's, your big qualification was that you had the ability to put the "Kosher For Passover" labels on the products. You once put that label on bacon !

Listen Boy Genius,  I DO know the difference between schmaltz herring and herring in wine sauce.  Cherry Herring was a Danish cherry flavored Cordial which was popular way back in the 1960's where you seem to be stuck in a time warp.   If those were your glory days I feel sorry for you.

Did you need to fail an intelligence test to get a job at EJ Korvettes?  

I passed the relocated Waldbaums in the Douglaston  Shopping Plaza yesterday and it was closed!   Are they out of business or just modernizing????   Does anyone out there know?

As far as Kosher for Passover (KP) labels are concerned it's one big rip-off!  Now they have Sweet'n'Low which is KP!  That artificial sweetner is all chemicals to begin with and never handled by humans in the plant either on Passover or the rest of the year.  Rabbis are making a fortune with stuff like this.  It's no wonder how few Jews keep a Kosher home today.

Mr. Jarolem(AKA Schmaltz maven),

It just so happens that I had to walk to and from EJ Korvette's daily which is a longer walk than to teeny tiny Waldbaum's. Korvette employees were physical specimens, not waldbaum's wimps!By the way, did the Little Neck lions(small letters) ever get a rematch against the Sisters Of Mary's Merry Martyrs of Mumbo Jumbo ? If yes, did they lose that game also ?

PS- Did they ever fill your position of towel boy ??????????????

Yes the Little Neck Lions did get a rematch with that team.   In a hard fought battle the score was tied  14-14 at the end of regulation and therefore went into sudden death.

Since they believed in "The Reserection" and we didn't they won by default.

I found out that the relocated Waldbaum's in the Douglaston Plaza Shopping Center was now closed because the owner doubled the rent on the property and Waldbaums decided to abandon the sight.  There are no plans to reopen anywhere else in the area.  Douglaston/Little Neck without a Waldbaums is like Las Vegas without a casino. I can't believe this!

By the way, A Happy and Drunkard Saint Patrick's Day!

Kenny how can we get a wider audience for our discussions of Waldbaums vs EJ Korvettes on the New Message Forum?   Right now it's only you and I dirt bag!

Fairview Supermarket is supposed to come in where Waldbaum's was ! I heard that a customer at Waldbaum's asked you for a pound of lox. You were out of lox so you poured salt on a piece of Novie and told the customer it's the same thing ! No wonder you couldn't beat a group of Nuns in football ! Don't wear orange today Mr. O'Jarolem !

Perhaps you can have Katie Couric, Diane Sawyer, & Brian Williams announce it on the 7:00 PM news ! Maybe Larry Flynt can put an announcement in SCREW Magazine !

A few days ago the Rabbi's in Munsey NY said that Lox and Novi aren't Kosher because of a possible microscopic organism.  Then last week they backed off their statement when they realized that they get extra money to put their names on labels that say Kosher for Passover when the stores sell Lox and Novi for the Holidays.   What a bunch of "Goniffs"

What's next?  Kosher For Passover Toilet Paper?   #2 Pencils that are KP?

Tomorrow My Wisconsin Badgers play their first NCAA March Madness Basketball Game vs. Wolford(?).

What do you do different on Passover?  My wife keeps three sets of dishes and silverware: One for Meat during Passover;  one for Dairy; and one for Chinese Food!

Wofford ? The Little Neck Lions beat them ! I checked their schedule for this past year. Some of the schools they played are: The Girls Club Of South Dakota, PS 221, The Jewish Theological Seminary, The St. Mary's Grapefruit Choir, and The Grateful Dead. The dishes your wife uses for Chinese food on Passover, does she have to re-wash them an hour after you eat ?

Kentucky will win it all ! (if they can get by The Oxford University Shoes)

How do you know anything about Basketball?   I remember you being a spasdic.  Weren't you in the "Special" classroom at Bayside High School, you know, the room next to the library?   

You probably picked Wofford University to win the NCAA tourney.  Do you remember when Bayside was in the NYC High School Basketball Playoffs?  We got beat by Boys High by a two to one scoring ratio.  Everyone on their team could dunk the ball during warmups.  Bayside had only one guy, Gus Franzoni, who could even reach the rim with the ball. 

Now my college, CCNY, was a powerhouse back in the 1950's.  In 1951, I believe, they won both the NCAA and NIT tournaments.  A feat never to be repeated!!   They play these at the same time nowadays.

I thought by now everyone had forgotten about the point shaving scandal in 1951-52 at CCNY.  Do you think it was easy for those players to shave points, they move around so quickly it's hard to hold them still while you shave them.  I think they used a Gillette Safety Razor, or was it a Schick?   The shaving scandal actually involved the starting five players and the Coach, Red Holtzman, who all wore long beards and looked like EZ-Top. The police arrested the starting team at the airport going to Milwaukee to play Marquette.   The seven non-starters went on to Milwaukee and played the entire game and guess what?   They beat Marquette anyway!

Didn't you play Basketball for the Samuel Field YMHA team?   I remember seeing your team lose to the Williamsburgh Yeshiva for Girls in 1963.   Wasn't C-more on that team  too? What was your teams' nickname?  The Five Sheckles?

We beat the Williamsburg Yeshiva Girls in overtime ! It was the Barefoot Women of the Chasidach Mikvah who beat us badly ! If I remember correctly, they also beat YOUR little neck lions at potsy ! That would NEVER happen to a former Korvettes employee; only a Waldbaum's Wuss !!!!!

The Little Neck Lions were a wonderful football team in the early 1960's.

We didn't have little necks (the average collar size was 16 1/2") nor were we liars!

Stop badmouthing a group of local atheletes which produced medal winning Vietnam War Heroes, FBI Special Agents in the war against Illegal Drugs, and Life Saving NYFD Firefighters as well as handsome college graduates (yours truly)

Waldbaums was a perfect place to hone my skills at lox slicing and selecting smoked fish!. 

In addition to war heroes and FBI Agents, the Lions produced alcoholics, Waldbaum's wusses, and potsy players. Wasn't Richard Simmons your teammate ? I believe he was your team captain; your fearless leader ! a protege of Vince Lombardi !

Richard Simmons only led us in warmup exercises.   We also had female cheerleaders, of which I dated a few.  By the way, all of the Little Neck Lions drank.   After the Sunday games we would meet at the Little Neck Inn on Northern Blvd. or The Terrace Club which was a bar on Great Neck Road just North of Northern Blvd.   Most times we celebrated our victories with a beer or two.   You see, Kenny, that's what real men do!

You probably watched dancing shows or cartoons like a little a sissy would do.       

How come all those "REAL MEN"  used to order Shirley Temples to drink, not beer ! At halftime, the Lions used to do their knitting which impressed Coach Simmons.OOPS, I forgot that knitting was a pre-requisite to work at Waldbaum's , Mr. Max Jarolem, of 246-18 57 Drive in Beech Hills !

The only knitting we did was to heal our broken bones.

Waldbaum's employees were a tough bunch, that's why they trusted us with box cutters and deli knives.   EJ Korvette's workers were not given any sharp objects because management thought they were so depressed working there that they might commit Hari-Kari.   (or was that the old Chicago Cubs announcer Harry Carey?)

Why don't you check with Steve Gordon; he used to work at Waldbaums too

Mr. Jarolem,

Happy Pesach ! That's Happy Passover in Italian. Do Waldbaum's employees know what Passover is ? They probably eat matzah every day but PaSSOVER ! By the way , who is Mr. Gefilte of the gefilte fish family ?

Happy Passover to you and all the other Jews.  Of course Waldbaum employees knew about Passover.  Thats the holiday where we placed little labels on all the Kosher Products and raised the prices 25-50%.   If you were promoted to manager you could bless all the Passover products too!    When people would ask, "Are the hamhocks Kosher for Passover?"  We would respond, Yes, they were just blessed by Rabbi Dicker".

Remember; No bagels or Bialys during Passover!

i DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE JEWISH ! What do Little Neck Lions do on Passover , dri nk unlevened beer ???

Sure I'm Jewish.   I like Bagels & Lox, so I must be Jewish.  I hope my mother wasn't playing a mean trick on me?   As far as Passover is concerned, I only drink beer that has been Blessed by Rabbi O'Schwartz.  I think I was the only Jew on the Little Neck Lions football team when I played in !962-1965.  We also had one Afro-American player too.  

The name Miller could also be a German name.   One of the four horsemen of Notre Dame was named Miller.  He was the son of the owner of Miller Beer in Milwaukee Wisconsin.   Go Badgers!!!!  Did you ever play a real mans game, Sissy?

Did I ever play a man's game ? I was captain of the korvette's stoop ball and chinese handball teams !! At Waldbaum's, you played sports such as Pick up sticks, syncronized masturbating, and knitting 101 ! Donny Schoenhut also worked at Korvette's !

PS- How's the Kosher for Pesach stamping going ! How many a minute ????

You and Donny "The Donut" Schoenhut both worked at Korvettes?   Enough said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At Waldbaum's we played; Pickup the dented cans and hide the dents so we could resell them.  We played, ; pinch the cute checkers in the tuch.   We played; rotate the Dairy products, lock the new guy in the frozen food storage room, and spin the Assistant Manager.   Dave Reiter set the Guinness World's record for slicing novi and for the heaviest thumb on the scale.  Those were the days!

April Fool!

No wonder Waldbaum's closed down the hill by Macy's ! The dishonesty, thievery, and ripping off us consumers is a disgrace ! Being Jewish, you should be drowned in guilt ! When Passover ended, you probably put the leftover Kosher for Passover labels in the food . No wonder my schmaltz herring tasted like paper !!!!

When Passover was over we put all the unsold food products in cartons and stored them in the basement until the next Passover!   Only recently did they change the law which requires that Matzoh and other Passover products have the year printed on their packaging to insure the products are fresh.   So years ago the Giffiltee Fish could have been one or two years old.   Enjoy, Enjoy!  What did you do at EJ Korvettes during the Holidays?

I only worked at korvette's for a month. I worked in the Men's dept. and my employment ended when I told the dept. manager to stick his shirts and ties up his ass !

Max, so you're the one that used to pinch me in the butt when I wasn't looking. Even after all these years it's nice to know who my admirer was. Hope all had a Happy Passover.

I also remember that black kid who played with us on the Little Neck Lions. Can't remember his name, but he was a hard running back, I played safety and I would stand there during practice at Alley Pond Park, and try to tackle him. I would tackle him most of the time but it would only be because he would run right into me and knock me to the ground. I was sore after every practice. The only reason they let me play was because they said I had heart. The highlight of my career with them was an interception against one of the all black teams we played. No other memories there...got hit too hard.

Did Max appear to enjoy pinching you ? Only kidding ! He always took pinching seriously !

I never realized his level of arousal since I just found out it was him. How does he usually look to you?

I haven't seen him in a while ! I'll ask his wife !!!!!!!!!!!!

Steve Gordon,

If you think I was the one to pinched your behind at Waldbaums ,you are wrong!  I should have qualified my statement that I only pinched "Female" checkers like a gal named Linda.

I'm glad you remember your time with The Little Neck VFW Lions.  I wonder if coach Calvin C. Clark is still around.  I did a websearch and found that he had moved to Florida about ten years ago.  He would  easily be in his 80's but there are many in Florida as old or much older than that.   Kenny Miller's mom is in her 90's God bless her.   I think the running back you are referring to was Vic Wertz?   The team you were reffering to, that was all black, was it the Saint Albans Chargers?

All of us that worked in Waldbaums learned valuable life lessons;  like reading the freshness code on dairy products and how to nest shopping carts and how to tell fresh herring from not so fresh.  I loved working there and the boxing with Otis in the basement.

You haven't seen me in a while?

I email you on a regular basis and we met for dinner twice in the last year, once with several other Court Team allumni.  Don't you remember?  Is Alzheimer setting in? 

How are you feeling now that Duke won the NCAA Tournament?   They mentioned CCNY winning it all in 1950.  It was only 60 years ago.  I was 3 years old and I remember it as if it were yesterday.

At 3yrs. old, you were involved in the fixing of games at CCNY. That was the start of your illegal lifestyle. You went from fixing games to stamping Passover labels, to playing football against The Sisters of The Poor,to breaking windows playing stickball. What's next Mr. Jarolem , cheating in chess against Stevie Wonder ?????

Max,

Otis and I used to box all the time when I wasn't cutting myself on the bottle machine. We used to do a lot of wrestling too. He was a rail, but strong and I was about 125 lbs then and used to try and flip him...never could. When I was cashiering, I met BIG Jope Pepitone. remember him coming into Waldbaums? He was at my register...but too shy to get an autograph back then.

Couldn't tell you what team it was or if that was the running backs name, wasn't kidding, hept getting hit too hard. Lol. I just remember I had a great time playing for them. Do you know where in Fl the coach is? I'm here in Ocala, Fl.

See you soon.

Steve G.

No, Stevie Wonder beat me at chess.

My long career in illegal activities also includes finding a $5.00 bill in 1976 and not including it on my Federal Income Tax under "Other Income"/  Walking on the grass in Beech Hills in the 1960's/  chewing gum in class at JHS67/ and sneaking out of the lunchroom to get a slice of Pizza at the stores.   There you have it; a full confession!

I suppose you were an Angel?

Don't remember Joe Pepitone in Waldbaum.  What did he buy?  Bullets for his non-registered pistol?

I'll look up Cal Clark again to find out where in Florida he moved to.  Are you coming in for the reunion in May?

Mr. Jarolem,

I checked your rap sheet ! What about the time you stole the hair net from the woman who served the beans in the school cafeteria? What about the time you stole Little Johnny the cop's horn from his tricycle ? You're right up there with Al Capone, Dutch Schultz, and Jimmy Fotiadis !

Max,

You do know there's no limitation on income tax evasion. You're in deep dodo now buddy.

Yes, I will be at the reunion and bringing my golf clubs, hoping to play some golf at Douglaston CC. Last reunion we had a golf tourney with about 24 of us participating...lots of fun had by all. Maybe they'll do the same thing this time.

Steve G.

Put me in the same catagory with only Jewish Gangsters.

There was Meyer Lansky, Benjamin Siegel, Mickey Cohen, Dutch Schultz,  The Bernstein Brothers from Detroit, Jack Ruby, Bernie Madoff, Arnold Rothstein, etc., etc.

I almost forgot, I tried to get a 5 cent deposit back on a non-deposit bottle at Waldbaums.

How about Jimmy Fotiadisawitz ? You should feel ashamed of yourself trying to get a nickel back ! I used to try and shake the milk machine to get a free container.

Steve, I am not into golf anymore.   When I lived in Beech Hills I would sneak into the old North Hills golf course (now the Douglaston course) after Summer's dinner with my friends and play until it got too dark to see the ball. We played cat & mouse with the care taker who lived on the property.   Theoretically we were tresspassing.

Dave once hit the jackpot at the milk machine!  Containers continued coming out on the same quarter.   Remember 25 cents per quart of milk?

That's another mark on your long rap sheet ! I don't know why I associate with criminals !!!!!!!!!!!

Max,

You forgot Big Alfonso Capone. Sorry about the golf, but it's one of my few pleasures in life. Hardly ever played growing up, couldn't have told you what club to use for what distance. But I got the bug in '94 and still loving it.

Steve G.

Kenny there's more:

When I was in Little League I stoled a base!

While I was waiting for my wife to shop at Lord & Taylor I killed an hour!!!!!

Last week while paying for my grocery shop I swiped my credit card!

What about the time you drank fruit PUNCH ? What about the time you brought a pizza in for Rabbi Dicker on Yom Kippur ! Havew you no conscience ? What about the time you did your ventriliquist impersonation while talking to a deaf person.

Ten years ago I cheated death in a head-on collision on the Northern State Parkway.

Yesterday I took a nap.    I struck a deal when I bought a new car last year.  My lengthy record includes; killing, stealing, cheating, taking, and striking as well as income tax fraud.

You don't want to associate with the likes of me, do you?  

What about the time when your team beat the Sisters of the poor ? I'm sure you've tried to hit the lottery !

PS- Please don't embarrass us on Wednesday by ordering a Ham on Rye at Ben's !